(Author’s note: Okay, I’m out of time here. Still have several pre-written blog posts to publish, but you just gotta wait until I get back.)

Just south of and bordering Glacier National Park is a large area that goes by the romantic name “the Bob Marshall Wilderness”—or as it’s known to locals and REI shoppers, “The Bob.” And in the heart of the Bob, comprising part of the Continental Divide, is an enormous rock formation known as the Chinese Wall.

A bunch of you just started humming the Game of Thrones theme. Those who didn’t—uh, you’ll eventually be reading a lot of jokes about “taking the black” and the “White Walkers” that you won’t get at all. Sorry.

The Chinese Wall is my destination for the core of my big road trip. It’s a continuous 22-mile “cliff escarpment” (whatever that is) that rises 1,000 feet above the land to the east. I literally found out about it by turning on the Images part of Google Maps while I was poking around Montana and initially sketching this trip. I decided I wanted to see it in person. And I quickly learned that it’s a 2 1/2-day hike from the nearest parking space, or as far as I can tell, about the most remote location you can find in the lower 48.

I started researching my big backpacking adventure based around a singular goal, to stand at the base of this mammoth wall, and make it back bear-attack-free.

So that’s what I’ll be doing for the next five days.

Tonight—right after I post this, actually—I’m leaving Choteau, this small island of Wi-Fi accessibility, and driving back into the wall of mountains to my west. I park at a place called Benchmark, and first thing tomorrow, hit the trail.

As far as backpacking adventures go, it’s not too awful; I follow a river bed the whole way, giving me access to plenty of water (yes, rivers have WATER in them here), which means I don’t need to carry so much. (Water is heavy, y’all.) The route is relatively flat and low-elevation until the last couple of miles, when it rockets up 1200 feet in about two miles:

And then I’m there.

It may shock you to hear that I’m not posting daily blog entries the whole way. If you want to see what I’m doing in detail, though, I’m basically plagiarizing the route taken by this Montana nature photographer:

http://www.earmountain.com/page/bigchoteaucam/bigchinesewall1.html

Read through Parts 1 and 2, except for the side hike up to Prairie Reef, and that’s basically what I’m doing (then going back the way I came).

I’ve got a bear bell, bear spray, a SPOT personal locator, and I’m leaving a sign with my route in my car. I’ll be fine, y’all. And I’m very excited.

If all goes well (sheesh, don’t worry, it will!) then I’m back to civilization on Sunday, Sept. 18th, limping into the Hilton Garden Inn in Great Falls and passing out.

See y’all then. Don’t burn down Austin while I’m gone. No, really.